Online Dating Service Secrets

June 01, 2006

Your Online Dating Profile

When Your Online Profile Isn't Attracting the Right Kind of Attention

Getting started with online dating is exciting. You sign up, answer all the personality questions, and create a personal ad that you think makes you sound very desirable. You let your personal ad loose into cyberspace, cross your fingers, and you get ready for the best dating you've ever had.

Instead of having fun, however, you find yourself waiting, and waiting. No one is biting on your bait. Or worse, you don't seem to be attracting the type of person you had hoped to meet. What should you do next, especially when you've paid in advance for several months of membership?

You can cower in the corner and convince yourself you must really be a loser if you cannot manage to generate interest virtually. Or, you can rewrite your personal ad and try again. Advertisers do this all the time when they test different versions of an advertisement in an effort to determine which one is generating the best response.

When you are creating a personal ad, it should highlight your attributes as well as your strengths. It should also be organized and free of obvious typographical and grammar mistakes. A good way to begin the process of rewriting a personal ad is to break the ad down into a couple different categories and then fill in the details. All you're really doing is creating an outline, just like you used to do back in school.

The categories to cover include a description of your physical attributes and background, a section describing your interests and hobbies, and most importantly a section devoted to describing both the type of relationship you seek and the type of partner you seek.

As you begin filling in the details, keep the following in mind. First, always be honest in your descriptions. If you expect honesty from others, you've got to be honest yourself. Always be positive as well. Just think about the daily conversations you have with those around you. Aren't you turned off by the people who dwell on all the negative things that go on in their lives? Those unfortunate victims who never get a fair chance at life? Those left bitter from past relationships with family or loved ones?

You are and that is normal. If your personal ad sounds more negative than positive, you can be certain that those reading it are going to pass on the opportunity to find out more about you. They don't want to share your misery. Even mentioning what you are not looking for from a partner is negative. If you've included this type of information in your profile, remove it. Give this section a positive spin by focusing on the qualities you seek in another, instead.

Finally remember that your profile is a marketing piece, not a laundry list. Focus on a few things in life that make you and then elaborate on those. The more interesting what you write sounds, the more interesting you sound. So get out there and try again!

Posted by OnlineDating at 04:35 PM | Comments (0)

May 31, 2006

Creating Your Profile

Creating a Profile That Will Be Noticed

'Single white female, 27, loves cats, white wine, and strolling on the beach.'

You may think this says a lot about you, but when you're one of hundreds or thousands of potential candidates in the expansive world of online dating, a profile such as this won't attract much attention. It's bland, boring and outdated. Those who do happen to read this profile might think its author too is bland, boring and outdated. They'll move on without ever looking back.

Quality Counts more than Quantity - If you want other online daters to notice you, the profile you create needs to be unique, captivating, positive, honest, and even a bit funny. Your photo will draw some amount of attention, but what others really want is to know about the person behind the image. The only way they can do so is by reading what you have written about who you are.

When you create a profile, it's not necessarily how much you write that matters. Less can be more and when people are scanning hundreds of profiles, less is often better. One way to think about your profile is that it is in a sense a marketing tool and you are the product being marketed.

Market Yourself

To begin, your profile needs to grab the reader's attention. The best way to accomplish this is by writing a catchy opening. Make it interesting and intriguing because the goal here is to make the reader want to continue past the introduction. Short sentences work best.

From there, go on to list your benefits, which in a profile are your attributes, likes and dislikes, and your goals. Listing your vitals, things like your height, weight, build and perhaps your profession helps the reader create an image of you.

Next, focus on describing your personality. This involves mentioning the things you enjoy doing in your spare time, your goals and aspirations, where you've lived, the things that make you smile, and what you are looking for in a companion. Remember to sound positive because mentioning all the bad things that have happened to you is a real turn off.

Sounds like a lot to write and it can be. So what happens when writing isn't one of your strengths? Fortunately many of the online dating sites offer assistance with profile creation. Some use templates where you just fill in the blanks. Another effective approach is to study the profiles that catch your attention. Look at how they're written, the words being used, the message being conveyed. Use these as models for your own profile.

It's always a good idea to create a rough draft of your profile in a word processor where misspellings and grammar errors can be identified and corrected. When you've finished, put your profile aside for a day or so, then reread it to make sure it conveys the right image. When you're happy with what you've written, transfer it to your online profile. Revisit the profile from time to time and make changes as necessary.

Posted by OnlineDating at 06:38 AM | Comments (0)